Friday, October 9, 2009

To Plus One, or Not to Plus One... That is the Question

As many of you already know, cutting back on the guest list is probably one of the most challenging tasks when planning a wedding. We have around 350 people on our dinner list! We thought it would be around 300, maybe less, but now that we are over that by far, we need to start cutting people back. 

Mr. Milk is a laid-back, happy-go-lucky guy. So when he talks about the wedding with people, and they ask questions like "can i bring my brother along?" he is easily and naturally inclined to say "yeah, sure." Although we've discussed this already, I wanted to see where others stand on this topic.



We have been thinking to eliminate the "plus one" in our invitations, and restrict it to people who are in long-term/committed relationships. Granted more thought will be put into it at the time the invitations need to be sent out - don't want someone who doesn't know anyone else having to show up completely alone - but we also don't want to have a double standard. Know what I mean? We are concerned about costs and also don't want to have to remove someone from the guest list who is important to us, for someone that we don't even know.

I know there is no straightforward answer. Just wanted to see what you gals have thought about/done and any other suggestions.

5 fabulous blogger's comments:

Sarah said...

Thanks for stopping by! Yes, I am excited. Many have said that it's not as special if we go together to pick out a ring...10 years ago I would have said the same but at 32 (tick tick) I like the idea. If I am going to be wearing a ring forever, I have to love it ya' know?

I think eliminating the +1 is fine. We don't plan on a big wedding AT ALL but I think it's a good idea. Too many people bring someone and end up with someone else a few months later...

LauraLou said...

We're in the exact same spot! We thought our guest list would be around 250-300, but it's not at about 375, so we need go through and start cutting back, unfortunately. My FI is the same way - If someone were to ask, 'Hey, can I bring a few friends?' he'd definitely say, 'Sure!' Ahh.

Stacy Marie said...

I think it depends. For our wedding, if a family member (cousins mainly) isn't in a long-term relationship, then no +1. If it's a friend who knows lots of other people there and isn't in a committed relationship, no +1. We wanted to eliminate people bringing dates just because they can.

Maria said...

great post! we're having a similar issue!
i wanted to let you know you should check out my latest post... i'm returning the blog love!

Kristin said...

We SO had to cut down the list. It was brutal. The hubs comes from a place where EVERYONE and their mother is invited to each other's weddings, but he also comes from a place where cash bars are acceptable. Big difference between the north and south. Ah ha