Welcome! I'm a newlywed who started this blog to document the planning of our September 2010 wedding, and ended up addicted to blogging! Follow our journey through life as we try to find the way to our "perfect" marriage. Happy reading!
You can contact me at: chocolateloversconfessions[@]gmail[dot]com
So I was lying awake at 3am thinking about a conversation I had with Mr. Milk about our friends. Since we've been away from everyone for so long, we have few mutual friends. Most people are either his friends or my friends, and only a handful are OUR friends.
What does this mean though for us moving back to Cyprus? To give you a little back story about how this conversation came about, we were talking about one of Mr. Milk's friends, who has very recently decided to have his wedding one week after ours! He got engaged about a month ago and informed Mr. Milk that he was thinking about an early October wedding. Mr. Milk told him that we would likely be on our honeymoon then and to try to arrange it so that he could attend the wedding. They have been friends since middle school so Mr. Milk really wanted to be at his wedding.
So last week we find out that the wedding is being arranged and has been set for the week after ours. And no, he was not the one who told us, we found out from a third party. I flipped out! They have joined friends who will be travelling from other parts of Europe for our wedding so there's been no consideration for what they'll do. Then there's the issue of bachelor parties. Mr. Milk is planning on going to Mykonos with his buddies. He doesn't want to share a bachelor party! And for me, frankly I feel like some of our thunder has been taken away. I know it's somewhat childish but that's how I feel. On top of that, we will be having guests over from this part of the world, who we actually want to spend time with since they travelled thousands of miles and spent thousands of dollars to be there! Can you tell I'm pissed off? Do you think I am overreacting?
Anyway, it takes me some time to get over such things. When people are inconsiderate it drives me up the wall. So I tell Mr. Milk that if our international guests are still there I will not be leaving them to go to this so called friends wedding. And so started a larger discussion about friends and socializing.
Mr. Milk is far more social than I. He is quite content being in any kind of situation and making small talk with just about anybody. I on the other hand are far pickier about people who I call friends and am more of a home-body. I prefer to have friends over for dinner, talking, laughing, bonding, than to be out with a bunch of people I don't know but have to feign interest in. Plus I have greatly missed my best girls being over here, and I think at this point in my life, I just want my good old girlfriends versus the effort of making new friends, if that makes sense.
So what will happen when we are back in Cyprus? Will there be conflict about who to hang out with or will we naturally gravitate to some people versus others? And what if we prefer different people? What do we do when we're invited somewhere, with people that one of us isn't a huge fan of? These are all the questions that were floating around my head in the wee hours of the morning. My poker face is non-existant! This is definitely something I can work on, but for the most part I wear my heart on my sleeve and I fear people will be able to see right through me. I guess it will take some time for us to create our own social network as a couple and get into a natural flow. Maybe its just the stress of the big move that is making things look so daunting at the moment.
So what do you guys do? Any advice? How has it been for you guys to establish mutual friends?